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Lee Pitts

California cattleman Lee Pitts provides his brand of humor on issues surrounding the ag industry.

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Being a ranch real estate agent these days must be difficult because they must appeal to two distinct types of buyers. There are the lifestyle buyers, who couldn’t care less about a ranch’s carrying capacity, and then there are the ranchers, who have pulled the wool over their bankers’ eyes and can get financed to buy another place.

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Here is the correct way to load a horse.

1. First, catch your horse. Using apples, carrots and sweet talk, draw it near. When it’s eating out of your hand, rub its neck and attempt to put the lead rope around its neck.

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It’s been a while (30 years) since I, the god of good taste, answered your many questions regarding what’s in style. It’s quite natural that you’d seek guidance from such a fashion-forward expert as myself.

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I’m often asked by young students what they should study in college in order to become a professional writer. If I was one, perhaps I’d know. Other than the four mandatory years of English in high school, I’ve never taken a writing class in my life. Never.

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I’m sure you’ve read about the VFD. It’s kind of like BVD, bovine viral diarrhea, only VFD is a disease of the bureaucracy. In my opinion, it’s just another in a long line of regulations to fix something that wasn’t broke.

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A rancher must wear proper headgear at all times. He or she only takes off his or her hat in two instances: at a funeral or when soliciting funds from the banker.

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